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Tim McDonald

Rappers, Insurrections and Free Agent Running Backs

By March 18, 2014

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Rapper MIA

Now the NFL in a lawsuit wants $16.6 million from M.I.A., a rapper from Sri Lanka, for giving the middle finger during the halftime show of Super Bowl XLVI.

In my mind, there is only one big legal question here.

A rapper from Sri Lanka?

Or: Sri Lanka has a rapper?

I did some research on Sri Lanka and found it was not a suburb of Bombay, as I originally believed.

Here's what else I found. They love to insurrect in Sri Lanka. They're always having insurrections over there. It's sort of the national hobby.

They passed Kenya in 1995 as the chief exporter of tea. Kenya exports tea? Yes. Sri Lanka makes clothes for Victoria's Secret. They have a holiday every other day, usually involving Buddha and/or the moon.

I can't find anything about rappers, so I believe this whole thing is either a hoax or a hallucination. Rapper from Sri Lanka indeed!

Blame it on the NFL offseason.

In a related story, here is my list of the best running backs still available in the NFL free agent market.

- Getty Images

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